Starkers Superhero Match that means NEKKID
by AlaskaCannoli
Summary: Emails around the SV characters concerning a certain… naked superhero fight!


**Title:** Starkers Superhero Match (that means NEKKID)  
**Author(s):** Elphabakicksass & Ireallylikethisshow  
**Rating:** I have no idea. It flitters between R and PG-13.  
**Summary:** Emails around the SV characters concerning a certain… naked superhero fight!

_Author's Note_ Ireallylikethisshow, here speaking. Me and my hilarious friend wrote this thing together. We were inspired by a HP (Harry potter) version off in this link: funny and makes a ton of more sense then ours. So you should check it out!

But enjoy! 

Hey K-siters. This is elphabakicksass here. Ireallylikethisshow and I were inspired to write about a naked super match after we had read a certain Harry Potter fic about a naked quidditch match. We were in one of our silly moods and decided to make something creative out of it. You guys might have read our Lolliepop fic. Althought not many people read it. But I hope you like this one!  
we should put the link for the the lolliepop fic if we can find it

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**To:** JL- Justice League  
**From:** Martha  
**Subject:** Starkers super match

Dear heroes of every suit and color, 

This is Clark's- I mean, Superman's mom. And I'm just here to remind everyone that cookies and muffins will be provided for everyone after the, er, em, event. The… naked… event. I just wanted to remind everyone to come on time and that there will be medical assistance just in case.

Thank God Jonathan isn't around for this…

PS. Don't tell Clark I said this… but be nice. He's a shy boy. And, sometimes he gets a little competitive. Just… don't rub anything in his face because he's just so modest. I don't know. No one but the family (and Lois) has really seen Clark naked. Oh, and Lana. I forget about that. Anyway…. 

Martha Kent.   
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**To:** Aquaman  
**From:** Cyborg  
**Subject:** Naked Supermatch

Hey fishboy, I guess you won't be needing that shirt after all. This should be fun. I can't wait to see how Clark reacts to this. He wasn't there for the poker game. Too bad we lost that poker game to Kara, Diana, and Lois. Well at least we are in good shape.  
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**To:** Super!Girls fanclub!  
**From:** Lois  
**Subject:** WE GOT THE BOYS TO GET NAKED!

I still can't believe it! Hmm… it's not like I haven't seen a few things… or er, you know… 

Can't wait till Smallville gets a whiff of this!

And, Chloe. I wish you had come to the poker game. I know you're too busy dating Jimmy. (btw, you might want to be careful. I've seen Bruce throwing some interesting looks your way!)

Kara! Don't forget to sneak in a camera. And Lana! Please, don't let Lex read your emails. He's being a little to proactive if you know what I mean! wink

See ya later, keep true, fly high, and GET READY TO SEE OUR BOYS STRIP!  
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**To:** Cuzzy  
**From:** Chloe  
**CC:** Super!Girls fanclub!  
**Subject:** Boys in the buff

There's no way I'd miss the supermatch. I can't believe y'all beat the guys in poker. That's what they get for being cocky. Pardon the pun. Jimmy will just have to let me go because I've gotta see me some naked boys. Bruce, huh? I might have to take that into consideration. He's pretty attractive…

By the way, is there anyway we could profit from this? Make some money? Mail me if you have any ideas. Oh and Kara if you need any help with that camera I can probably help you with the technology.  
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**To:** Mom  
**From:** Clark  
**Subject:** Embarrassing email…

MOM! As much as I appreciate you're input on my… er… um… you know… I don't need the whole world knowing how I FEEL! Maybe I'm a private person and don't want myself on display.

AND WHAT ON EARTH DOES EVERYONE MEAN WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT A NAKED SUPER FIGHT?

Your son, cowering in fear.  
Clark.   
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**To:** My btches: AC, Clark, Victor, & Bart  
**From:** Oliver Queen:  
**Subject: Re:** Starkers super match

Alright boys are y'all excited for this Supermatch! I'm not nervous at all! Clark don't worry about it, the girls will go crazy. Plus, it's not like half of them haven't already seen your business. Let's see, Lois, Lana, I dunno about Chloe. See, nothing to worry about?  
And of course we all know I have the biggest arrow in the quiver.  
I think we should organize something to make it look uniform? Maybe get JL tattoos. Oh that's right Clark can't be pierced by needles. Well damn. If anyone has ideas let me know.

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**To:** Lionel  
**From:** Lex  
**Subject:** Strange emails.

It comes to my completely brilliant and superior attention, ahem (you know it's true!) That some kind of 'super event' is about to begin. Something awful strange in my opinion. Something that involves a certain amount of duplicity and nudity that would awe the world to tears.

Are you listening, my _senile_ father? Because this is quite extraordinary.

You are probably wondering, 'how would he know?'. Well. I'm a snoop. I looked through all of Lana's files and found out about this 'strange' event in her super!girl fan club emails. And a letter to Pete… 

There is to be… a naked super hero fight.

Yes, you heard me! NAKED. NEKKID. Nudity, and that's a very rated-R thing isn't it? But now comes an even greater question from a superior being.

Are you going to go? I'm excited! Lana had to ask Chloe if I could, but it should be okay. It'll be interesting to compare 'assets' if you know what I mean. Maybe I'm a jealous boyfriend but I feel a hankering for some nude play. ANYWAY. I'll see you there, right?

You're superior son,  
Alexander (Lex) Luthor, the great and amazing! The sex God. 

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**To:** Chloe:  
**From:** Lana: Super!Girls fanclub!: Lois, Kara, Chloe, Lana & Diana.  
**Subject:** Re: WE GOT THE BOYS TO GET NAKED!

Hey, um, Lex hacked into my emails and read about the Supermatch. He really wants to go. Could I bring him along if he promises not to hatch any diabolical plans? Please?

Also, can someone remind me why I'm married to him?

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**To:** Oliver Queen  
**From:** Aquaman  
**CC:** Starkers Supermatch  
**Subject:** Time to let the girls gape!

Hey man, no tattoos on this brilliant smooth chest of mine!

But, dude, I totally get what you're saying! I'm ready to let all this ho-yay out! I'm wet and ready, bro! TIME TO LET THIS WHALE OUT OF THE OCEAN! (You're just a little guppy:P )

Er, um… just in case anyone wants to see it, ya know?

Anyway. Nothing to be shy about, I think Clark is into this too. He's been dying to impress the girls I'm sure!

The sea dude, AC. 

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**To:** Clark  
**From:** Mom  
**Subject:** Calm down sweetie

Dear Clark,

Haven't you heard? The rest of the Justice Leaguers lost a bet to the girls. Now you guys have to have a naked super match. Just relax. It'll all be okay. I know you're bigger than all those boys Clark! (I guess it runs in the family…) Show 'em what you've got and make me proud son!  
Oh and do you know where would be a safe location to have it?

Your Loving Mother

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**To:** Clark  
**From:** Lois  
**Subject:** Concerning Clark Jr…

Dear Smallville,

I just emailed to make sure I'd see my old friend at the super match. I'm very excited that we get to meet again. Old Clarky and I never got to really talk.

He will be there right? I saved a seat just for him!

Anyway, just wondering… it's very important that Clark Jr. and I catch up on old times. I bet he's gotten bigger since then! They always seem to grow up when you're not there, right?

Be careful, avoid STDS (especially from LANA), and hope to see him soon!  
Your pal, Lois. 

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**To:** Lex  
**From:** Lionel  
**Subject:** Re: Strange emails

Dear Son (Who is way below my level of power and intelligences)

I have indeed heard whispers of such an event. I shall not reveal my sources though. I suppose you plan to capture some photos for your private uses later. I would love to be included on such a project. I do however, respect your privacy. But I do suggest you don't tell Lana of these photographs.

Speaking of which, I wouldn't recommend going through her private emails. It doesn't build for a trustworthy relationship.

I do plan to attend this event. I expect Martha will be there. Perhaps we can compare notes afterwards… Anyway!

I shall see you there son. And I wouldn't worry about your rather minimal assets… you don't have to go naked after all.

Your amazing father,  
Lionel


End file.
